This Girl Can! Slay Her Own Dragons-Thanks Daddy!
“It’s up to us to say to our daughters, don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for those goals.”
~Barack Obama
We talk so often about the importance of girls having role models to look to, and to see that there are women who were once girls just like them, who followed their dreams. We want every girl to know about women’s stories from history and today. We want her to learn about the women who kicked open doors so that now she can walk through and pursue her own paths and maybe even kick some of her own doors open for other girls to follow.
For every girl, however, it is equally important for her to know to her core that she has a cheering squad right alongside her as she makes her journey. She needs to look around and see the people who love her, who believe in her, and who always help her to pick herself up, dust herself off, and get right back in that race. Sound familiar?
If you are lucky enough, this cheering section starts with your Dad. For a girl, a Dad can be a hero, but he is also her foundation. Her Dad can be her greatest ally, coach, teacher…Her Dad is the one who slays the dragons under the bed, and the one who instills in her a sense that she can be brave! There is nothing she cannot do, and she can in fact slay her own dragons when she needs to. And when she falls, and she will, he is there to put a band-aid on, help her regain her footing, and ensure that she doesn’t quit.
While ensuring that every girl has access to mentors who can show her the way and help build her confidence, we need to be sure that we are also looking to the men and boys in her life. When we talk about gender equity, we cannot exclude the men and boys in a girl’s world out of that very important conversation.
For a girl to believe in her own power, she needs to see and to know that the men and boys in her life believe in her too. Knowing they are there for her journey and stand with her as she pushes her walls and grows her confidence is essential to holding on to that confidence as she grows and tests her powers.
A girl’s Dad is also a model, the model of what a man can and should be for her, supporting, listening, encouraging, and loving. Knowing she can try her wings with a safe landing can start with her Dad. Understanding the positive and supporting role a man can, and should have, in her life begins with her Dad as well. The relationship a daughter has with her Dad helps her to gain a sense of empowerment from the love and encouragement she receives. She will be rooted in the knowledge that she is strong, she is smart, and she can do anything! She will carry the confidence to not only use her mind but also speak her mind. She will grow to be independent and walk her own path, knowing that if she encounters obstacles or roadblocks, she can overcome them. This can all start with a Dad. A Dad who knows that every girl can and should have the same opportunities as the boys on the field, a Dad who sets the bar, the gold standard, for how girls view the role men should have in their lives.
“She did not stand alone, but what stood behind her, the most potent moral force in her life, was the love of her father.”
~ Harper Lee
While every man a girl encounters and interacts with in her journey may not always provide or demonstrate the same attitude and positive support as her Dad, a Dad instills tools on how to handle the nay-sayers. With confidence and a core belief that she belongs in the room, she can handle her own emotions in situations of disrespect and conquer those dragons who want to dismiss her simply because she is a girl.
“Being a daddy’s girl is like having permanent armor for the rest of your life.”
~ Marinela Reka
The term “Daddy’s Girl” very often has negative connotations, but it shouldn’t. It doesn’t matter if you are your Dad’s Princess, that just means he has given you the power to be, to go forward with strength, and confidence, and to believe in your own power to follow your dreams.
A girl’s Dad is the one who leaves his daughter a gift to be opened whenever she needs it, long after he is gone...the gift that she is loved, the gift that there is always someone who believes in her, the gift that helps her stand on her own feet and move forward knowing This Girl Can! Change the World.
"There is Too Much Work to Do" Keep Marching On!
“People say, what is the sense of our small effort?
They cannot see that we must lay one brick at a time,
take one step at a time.
A pebble cast into a pond causes ripples that spread in all directions. Each one of our thoughts, words and deeds is like that. No one has a right to sit down and feel hopeless.
There is too much work to do.”
~ Dorothy Day
Yes, it's been a week! and Yes, emotions, anxiety and simple dread are filling every inch within us and around us.
Through the fog of where we are, and the blow to our hopes, however, comes clarity-get back to work!
True, it may not be as simple as "pick yourself up, dust yourself off..." but history shows us that is exactly what we need to do. Women did not just land in a space where a woman could receive over 70 million votes in her bid to be President of the United States. It was the work, the determination, the persistence and the resistance of generations of women, and men who believed in those women and their rights, to get here. Setbacks, no matter their dimensions or seismic proportion, are a part of that history, and a part of every girl's journey to stand where she wants.
With each turn of history,however, we get to do it differently, see it differently, listen differently, and move forward differently. While the lessons of this week are still to be understood one thing is certain-we don't stand still.
So, what can this girl do?
At This Girl Can! Change the World nothing that happened this week changes anything except to strengthen our commitment to girls everywhere.
Our mission has always been about inspiring every girl to know their own power. We want every girl to understand she has a voice and the right to walk into any room she chooses at any time.
We want to support every girl to have the confidence that grows with her, an unshakeable confidence and sense of self that allows her to believe in her own power to realize her dreams.
We know what happens to young girls as they enter their tween and teen years. All the amazing confidence, the girl spunk, they have erodes, and many girls simply fall off the confidence cliff.
We do not want to see any girl lose her belief in her own power.
We do not want any girl to question her place or her voice.
We do not want any girl to ever feel she does not belong...or that she can't...because we know This Girl Can!
We know that positive role models, mentors who support and show the way, learning about women's history and telling women's stories, and amplifying affirming portrayals in popular culture and media are all key to helping every girl see what is possible.
So how do we help our girls understand this week when we as adults may not yet understand. How do we help them with the hurt and disappointment that we all are carrying? How do we create the path for them to soar?
We start with acknowledging it hurts but also looking at what there is to celebrate. We point to all the women throughout history who got up the next day and kept moving forward. Though the potential was not realized THIS TIME, stepping back, sitting down, giving up, giving in will never be the way to build lasting change. These are lessons that are not about one woman, one election, but rather about how every girl can navigate her own personal journey and achieve her own goals.
To do this,however, she needs us to show her we believe in her! and help her to believe in herself.
"The important thing is don't ever give up. Don't ever give up. Don't ever stop trying to make the world a better place. You have power. You have power. And don't you ever listen when anyone tells you something is impossible because it has never been done before."
~Vice President Kamala Harris
Now more than perhaps ever before we need to support girls understanding of what is possible. No, it may not always work out, but we need to foster their confidence to get up and most especially try again and again and again.
Progress is not instant soup and learning about women's stories throughout history will show that well. Our kids are from an instant gratification culture...a two minute tik tok is about the extent of their investment of time. So teaching them that justice is slow but worth the work is essential as is showing every girl that no matter the moment, no matter the current outcome, This Girl Can! Use Her Voice...This Girl Can! Choose Her Own Path... This Girl Can! Walk into Any Room... This Girl Can! Do Something... This Girl Can! Change the World.
Keep Marching On!
“Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.”
— Harriet Tubman